You have reached the limits of the free existence plan.
A suited vulture guards a locked water tap while a small jester waits with a cup beneath “Sorry, Your Basic Needs Require Premium.”
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Check the available colors and sizes above. For garment measurements, Contact the Court before ordering.
Production & delivery
Your shirt is made after you order, then shipped. Timing varies by destination, production capacity, and shipping method. Check available shipping options and charges at checkout.
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Returns & order issues
No routine returns or exchanges for a change of mind or choosing the wrong size or color. For damaged, defective, incorrect, or incomplete items, contact us within 30 days of delivery. Your rights under applicable law are unaffected.
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More from the Fool
The jester requested water. The attendant explained that water was an enhanced feature.
The basic plan included thirst, a helpful notification, and the opportunity to upgrade. Customer satisfaction was measured by whether the cup remained empty.
A sharp cartoon about necessities treated like luxury extras. For people who have noticed that the sales pitch gets stranger when opting out is not really an option. Terms apply. Apparently to everything.
Long Live the Fool.
