{"product_id":"earth-would-not-recommend-alien-tee","title":"Earth — Would Not Recommend Alien Tee","description":"\u003cdiv style=\"font-size:15px;line-height:1.65;\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eThe galaxy’s shortest travel review has arrived.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAn unimpressed alien in a jester hat pilots a purple flying saucer above “Earth. Would Not Recommend.” Interplanetary disappointment, with excellent comic timing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cdetails style=\"border-top:1px solid #d6b65c;padding:16px 0;\"\u003e\u003csummary style=\"cursor:pointer;font-weight:600;\"\u003eNeed help choosing a size?\u003c\/summary\u003e\u003cp\u003eCheck the available colors and sizes above. For garment measurements, \u003ca href=\"\/pages\/contact\"\u003eContact the Court\u003c\/a\u003e before ordering.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/details\u003e\u003cdetails style=\"border-top:1px solid #d6b65c;padding:16px 0;\"\u003e\u003csummary style=\"cursor:pointer;font-weight:600;\"\u003eProduction \u0026amp; delivery\u003c\/summary\u003e\u003cp\u003eYour shirt is made after you order, then shipped. Timing varies by destination, production capacity, and shipping method. Check available shipping options and charges at checkout.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003ca href=\"\/policies\/shipping-policy\"\u003eRead shipping \u0026amp; delivery\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/details\u003e\u003cdetails style=\"border-top:1px solid #d6b65c;padding:16px 0;\"\u003e\u003csummary style=\"cursor:pointer;font-weight:600;\"\u003eReturns \u0026amp; order issues\u003c\/summary\u003e\u003cp\u003eNo routine returns or exchanges for a change of mind or choosing the wrong size or color. For damaged, defective, incorrect, or incomplete items, contact us within 30 days of delivery. Your rights under applicable law are unaffected.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003ca href=\"\/policies\/refund-policy\"\u003eRead the full returns policy\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/details\u003e\u003cdetails style=\"border-top:1px solid #d6b65c;padding:16px 0;\"\u003e\u003csummary style=\"cursor:pointer;font-weight:600;\"\u003eMore from the Fool\u003c\/summary\u003e\u003cp\u003eCame for intelligent life. Stayed because departure clearance is apparently a whole thing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eOur visitor has seen the sights, sampled the atmosphere, and found the customer-service desk remarkably difficult to locate. A purple saucer and a thoroughly unimpressed expression deliver the sort of review the tourism board hoped would stay private.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFor space oddballs, reluctant earthlings, and anyone who has looked around lately and asked whether another planet is accepting transfers. No return ticket included. 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